MAD #59 — December 1960

"When adults act like children, they're called 'immature' — when children act like adults, they're called 'juvenile delinquents'!" — Alfred E. Neuman

Contents

• Aren't You Glad You Dial Correctly?

  Photo by Lester Krauss

  Reprinted in 4 collections

  • The Worst From MAD #5 — 1962 Annual
  • MAD Special #40 — Fall 1982
  • MAD About the Sixties — 1995
  • MADvertising — 2005
  C2
• Contents Page
  1
• Letters Dept.

  Notes

  • Alfred E. Neuman Halloween Costumes / ads for Alfred E. Neuman bust, A Golden Trashery of MAD, Alfred E. Neuman portrait, Subscriptions
  2–3
• English Translations of Foreign Phrases

  Marginal Thinking Dept.

  Written by Gary Belkin
  (various places around the magazine)
• If Doctors Advertised

  There's Gold in Them There Ills Dept.

  Written by Gary Belkin / Art by Bob Clarke

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • The Worst From MAD #5 — 1962 Annual
  • MADvertising — 2005
  4–7
• The MAD Side-Show of "Modern Freaks"

  Berg's-Eye View Dept.

  Dave Berg
  8–9
• Complete Historical Quotations Including Those Famous Lost Words

  To Spurn a Phrase Dept.

  Written by Gary Belkin / Art by George Woodbridge

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • The MAD Sampler — 1965 (Paperback #18)
  10–13 sample
• TV Ads We'd Like to See — The Polydent Commercial

  Television Dept.

  Written by Al Jaffee / Art by Joe Orlando

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • MAD Special #1 — Fall 1970
  • MAD Special #127 — March 1998
  14
• The Safe Crackers

  Don Martin Dept. Part I

  Don Martin

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • The Worst From MAD #5 — 1962 Annual
  • MAD's Greatest Artists — The Completely Mad Don Martin — 2007
  15–16
• TV's Wonder Dog Lizzie (TV satire)

  Mutt Ado About Nothing Dept.

  Written by Larry Siegel / Art by Mort Drucker

  Reprinted in 6 collections

  • The Worst From MAD #5 — 1962 Annual
  • The MAD Sampler — 1965 (Paperback #18)
  • Completely MAD — 1991 (excerpt)
  • MAD About the Sixties — 1995
  • MAD For Decades — 2007
  • MAD Goes to the Dogs & Other Beasties! — Special Collector's Edition 2024
  17–21 sample
• How to Get Complete Newspaper Coverage

  Slop the Press Dept.

  Written by Frank Jacobs / Art by Joe Orlando

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • The Worst From MAD #5 — 1962 Annual
  • The MAD Sampler — 1965 (Paperback #18)
  22–23
• Commercial Roulette

  A Turn for the Worse Dept.

  Written by Gary Belkin / Art by Bob Clarke

  Reprinted in 7 collections

  • The Worst From MAD #5 — 1962 Annual
  • The MAD Sampler — 1965 (Paperback #18)
  • MAD Special #34 — Spring 1981
  • MAD About the Sixties — 1995
  • MADvertising — 2005
  • Totally MAD — 2012
  • Totally Inside MAD — 2016
  24–27
• How They Spent Their Summer

  And Then I Wrote Dept.

  Written by Gary Belkin / Art by Bob Clarke

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • More Trash From MAD #5 — 1962 Annual
  28–29
• New Service Organizations for a Lazy America

  Take it Lying Down Dept.

  Written by Frank Jacobs / Art by Joe Orlando

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • More Trash From MAD #9 — 1966 Annual
  30–33 sample
• Dear Mr. Gaines, the publisher,

  Please excuse my son, the editor, for not putting anything on this page, but he was home sick today!
  Sincerely,
  Mrs. Feldstein

  No Dept.

  Written by Gary Belkin / Art by Bob Clarke

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • The Worst From MAD #5 — 1962 Annual
  • The MAD Sampler — 1965 (Paperback #18)
  34
• The Two Faces of World War II

  Mine Enemy Grows Nicer Dept.

  Written by Larry Siegel / Art by George Woodbridge

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • Completely MAD — 1991 (excerpt)
  • The MAD Sampler — 1965 (Paperback #18)
  35–38
• The Parent from the Ages of 21 to 60

  The Patter of Big Feet Dept.

  Written by Al Jaffee / Art by Wally Wood

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • The Worst From MAD #5 — 1962 Annual
  • The MAD Sampler — 1965 (Paperback #18)
  39–47
• The Wonderful New Dart Set

  Don Martin Dept. Part II

  Don Martin

  Reprinted in 4 collections

  • More Trash From MAD #5 — 1962 Annual
  • The MAD Sampler — 1965 (Paperback #18)
  • The Completely Mad Don Martin — 1974 Big Book
  • MAD's Greatest Artists — The Completely Mad Don Martin — 2007
  48
• Ad for Like, MAD paperback
  C3
• Back Cover — Aarow Shirts

  Art by Kelly Freas

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • More Trash From MAD #4 — 1961 Annual
  • MADvertising — 2005
  C4