MAD #79 — June 1963

"It's a good thing the Earth turned out to be round, because putting a satellite into a square orbit would've been costly!" — Alfred E. Neuman

Contents

• Yellow Pages — After You Let Your Fingers Do the Walking

  Written by Sergio Aragones / Photo by Lester Krauss

  Reprinted in 4 collections

  • The Worst From MAD #8 — 1965 Annual
  • MAD Special #40 — Fall 1982
  • MADvertising — 2005
  • MAD #17 — February 2021
  C2
• Contents Page
  1
• Letters Dept.

  Notes

  • Ads for Alfred E. Neuman bust, Fink Along With MAD L.P., MAD "Twists" Rock 'N' Roll L.P., Subscriptions — "Looking for a bargain?" (sculpture by Giuseppe Baggi), Alfred E. Neuman portrait, A Golden Trashery of MAD
  2–3
• Drawn-Out Dramas

  Marginal Thinking Dept.

  Sergio Aragones
  (various places around the magazine) summary
• If They Held a Summit Meeting at the White House

  A White House is Not a Home Dept.

  Written by Arnie Kogen / Art by Mort Drucker
  4–8
• Look Before You Leap

  Sinking Fund Dept.

  Written by Sergio Aragones / Art by Joe Orlando

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • The Worst From MAD #8 — 1965 Annual
  • The Indigestible MAD — 1968 (Paperback #24)
  9 sample
• Speaking From Pictures

  Freedom With Speech Dept.

  Written by Gerald Gardner / Photos by UPI
  10–11
• TV's Effect on Children

  Half-Neilsen Dept.

  Written by Stan Hart / Art by Wally Wood
  12–14
• The High Dive

  Don Martin Dept. Part I

  Don Martin

  Reprinted in 3 collections

  • The Worst From MAD #8 — 1965 Annual
  • The Completely MAD Don Martin — 1974 Big Book
  • MAD's Greatest Artists — The Completely MAD Don Martin — 2007
  15
• Movie Dialogue We'd Like to Hear

  Off the Beaten Sound Track Dept. Part I

  Written by Harry Purvis / Art by George Woodbridge

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • More Trash From MAD #8 — 1965 Annual
  16–17
• How to Succeed at Childhood

  Bratmanship Dept.

  Written by Pearl Belkin / Art by Bob Clarke

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • More Trash From MAD #8 — 1965 Annual
  18–20
• Spy vs. Spy — dart thrown at inflated spy / chimney cannon bombs bomber / hat spring bomb diverter / spy in defused bomb

  Joke and Dagger Dept.

  Antonio Prohias

  Reprinted in 6 collections

  • More Trash From MAD #8 — 1965 Annual
  • MAD's Big Book of Spy vs. Spy Capers and Other Surprises — 1978
  • Spy Vs. Spy — The Complete Casebook — Antonio Prohias — 2001
  • Spy Vs. Spy — Omnibus — Antonio Prohias — 2011
  • MAD Presents Spy Vs. Spy — An Explosive Celebration — 2015
  • MAD Presents Spy vs Spy: The Big Blast — Special Collector's Edition 2016
  21–22 sample sample
• Tax Time U.S.A.

  The Ides of Taxes Are Upon Us Dept.

  Written by Dick DeBartolo / Art by Jack Rickard
  23–26
• How to Turn Your Dumpy City into an Attractive Tourist Trap

  Dept. of the Inferior

  Written by Stan Hart / Art by Joe Orlando
  27–31
• The First Echo

  Don Martin Dept. Part II

  Don Martin

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • MAD Special #45 — Winter 1983
  • MAD's Greatest Artists — The Completely MAD Don Martin — 2007
  32
• MAD's Realistic, Up-To-Date Service Songs

  March Along With Mitch Dept.

  Written by Larry Siegel / Art by George Woodbridge

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • The Indigestible MAD — 1968 (Paperback #24)
  33–35
• The Lighter Side of Family Doctors

  Berg's-Eye View Dept.

  Dave Berg

  Reprinted in 3 collections

  • The Worst From MAD #8 — 1965 Annual
  • MAD Special #2 — Spring 1971
  • Dave Berg's MAD Trash — 1977 Big Book
  36–39
• The Rise and Fall of a Recording Star

  Slipped Disc Dept.

  Written by Tom Koch / Art by Jack Rickard

  Reprinted in 4 collections

  • The Worst From MAD #8 — 1965 Annual
  • The Indigestible MAD — 1968 (Paperback #24)
  • The Ridiculously Expensive MAD — 1969
  • MAD Special #131 — October 1998
  40–41
• More Movie Dialogue We'd Like to Hear

  Off the Beaten Sound Track Dept. Part II

  Written by Harry Purvis / Art by George Woodbridge

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • More Trash From MAD #8 — 1965 Annual
  42
• MAD's "Discount Center" Owner of the Year

  The Price is a Riot Dept.

  Written by Larry Siegel / Art by Wally Wood

  Reprinted in 3 collections

  • The Worst From MAD #8 — 1965 Annual
  • More Trash From MAD #8 — 1965 Annual
  • The Indigestible MAD — 1968 (Paperback #24)
  43–47 sample
• The Inventor at the Novelty Company

  Don Martin Dept. Part III

  Don Martin

  Reprinted in 5 collections

  • The Worst From MAD #8 — 1965 Annual
  • The Indigestible MAD — 1968 (Paperback #24)
  • The Completely MAD Don Martin — 1974 Big Book
  • MAD's Greatest Artists — The Completely MAD Don Martin — 2007
  • MAD's Greatest Artists — Don Martin — 2014
  48
• Ad for The Voodoo MAD pocketbook
  C3
• Back Cover — Association of American Florists

  Photo by Lester Krauss

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • The Worst From MAD #8 — 1965 Annual
  • MADvertising — 2005
  C4