MAD #428 — April 2003

"Before you buy a new mattress, you should probably sleep on it!" — Alfred E. Neuman

Contents

• Contents Page
  1
• Letters and Tomatoes Dept.

  Notes

  • Stills from Oct. 25, 2002 Jeopardy! show MAD category, John Caldwell illustrates a simultaneous burp, fart, sneeze
  2, 4, 6
• Drawn-Out Dramas

  Marginal Thinking Dept.

  Sergio Aragones
  (various places around the magazine)
• Bored of the Rings — The Two+ Hours (movie satire)

  Breaking a Nasty Hobbit Dept.

  Written by Desmond Devlin / Art by Hermann Mejia

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • MAD About the Movies — Director's Cut — 2008
  • Disturbingly Awful MAD — 2013
  8–14
• The Employing Guise

  Hire Education Dept.

  Written by Jeff Kruse / Art by Ray Alma and Timothy Shamey / Photos by Irving Schild

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD Classics #21 — April 2008
  15–17
• MAD Sizes Up the 2003 Oscars — Best Actor

  We'd Like to Spank the Academy Dept. Part I

  Written by Greg Leitman, Mike Snider, Barry Liebmann, and David Shayne / Art by Drew Friedman / “Alfie” statue art by Harry North, Esq.
  18–19
• Monroe and... Discrimination

  Angster's Paradise Dept.

  Written by Anthony Barbieri / Art by Bill Wray
  20–23
• Spy vs. Spy — package bomb stolen in mail truck

  Joke and Dagger Dept.

  Peter Kuper

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • Spy Vs. Spy 2 — The Joke and Dagger Files — 2007
  • Spy vs. Spy — The Top Secret Files — 2011
  24–25
• MAD Sizes Up the 2003 Oscars — Best Actress

  We'd Like to Spank the Academy Dept. Part II

  Written by Greg Leitman, Barry Liebmann, Mike Snider, and David Shayne / Art by Rick Tulka / “Alfie” statue art by Harry North, Esq. / Color by Jack Syracuse
  28–29
• A MAD Look at Video Gamers

  Serge-In General Dept.

  Sergio Aragones

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD's Greatest Artists: Sergio Aragonés — 2010
  30–33
• Disposable Camera Wedding Photos That Didn't Make the Album

  Prints Uncharming Dept.

  Written by Butch D'Ambrosio / Art by Timothy Shamey

  Reprinted in 4 collections

  • MAD Classics #25 — May 2009
  • Totally MAD — 2012
  • The Golden Treasury of Trash — Special Collector's Edition 2013
  • Totally Inside MAD — 2016
  34–36 sample
• The Slo-Man's Advanced Home Security System

  An Embarrassment of Richard's Dept.

  Written by Dick DeBartolo
  37
• Other Medical “Surveys” The Public Never Heard About

  Getting a Stat Scan Dept.

  Written by Andrew J. Schwartzberg / Art by Tom Bunk
  38–39
• MAD's Not So Daring Outtakes from Daredevil

  Blind Man's Fluff Dept.
  40–41
• Your Team May Not Be Final Four Material If...

  Hoop-Blah Dept.

  John Caldwell

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD Classics #21 — April 2008
  42–44
• MTV Making the Video: Osama Bin Laden

  Lights, Camels, Action! Dept.

  Written by Dave Croatto / Art by Bill Wray
  45–48
• MAD Sizes Up the 2003 Oscars — Best Picture

  We'd Like to Spank the Academy Dept. Part III

  Written by Greg Leitman, Barry Liebmann, Mike Snider, and David Shayne / Art by Tom Richmond / “Alfie” statue art by Harry North, Esq.
  50–51
• MAD Survey (promotion)

  Tom Bunk art from “Internet Ready Keyboard” Icons That Tell It Like It Is
  52
• Fold-In — Who is responsible for a major increase in crack on our streets?

  Al Jaffee

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • The MAD Fold-In Collection 1964–2010 — 2011
  • MAD Treasure Trove of Trash — Vol. 10 — Jan/Feb 2025
  C3