Mad #437 January 2004

Celebrities Cover Artist: Bill Wray
Celebrities Cover Photos: AP & Wide World
Alfred Cover Artist: Mark Fredrickson
Contents Page (1)
Letters (2,4,6)
Ad for Mad About Comic Strips book
Sergio Aragones Drawn-Out Dramas **various places around the magazine
The Blue Shield (TV satire)
(written by Charlie Kadau / Angelo Torres art / gray tones by Wildstorm) (8-12)
When Department Store Santas Go Bad (John Caldwell) (14-16)
Mad's Epic Outtakes from The Lord of the Rings - The Return of the King
(written by Greg Leitman) (18-20)
The Mad 20 Dumbest People, Events and Things of 2003 (introduction page) (21)
- 1. The California Recall - "Term Eliminator: Rise of the Political Machines" -
  (Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines movie poster parody)
  (written by Andrew J. Schwartzberg / Steve Chorney art) (22)
- 2. Britney and Madonna Shamelessly Swap Spit - "Garbage Pail Kiss" -
  (Garbage Pail Kids sticker parody) (Tom Bunk art) (23)
- 3. The Fall of Geraldo Rivera -
  (photo of Saddam Hussein statue toppling parody) (Michael Elins art) (24)
- 4. Jessica Replaces Homer as TV's Dumbest Simpson - "Dumb Teen People" -
  (Teen People magazine cover satire) (written by Frank Santopadre / Irving Schild photos) (26)
- 5. Sammy Sosa's Grand Sham - "Cheaties" -
  (Wheaties cereal box parody) (written by Frank Santopadre) (28)
- 6. George W. Bush - "G.I. Joke Action Figure" -
  (G.I. Joe toy doll parody) (written by Russ Cooper / Irving Schild photos) (29)
- 7. Man Ships Himself Cross-Country - "PeopleFreight.com" (online shipping parody)
  (written by Charlie Kadau / Timothy Shamey art) (32)
- 8. Fox News Sues Al Franken - "Al Frankenstein"
  (Frankenstein movie poster parody) (written by Russ Cooper / Michael Koelsch art) (33)
- 9. Jayson Blair Butchers The New York Times: All the Lies He Saw Fit to Print
  (Drew Friedman art) (34)
- 10. The Music Industry Sues File Sharers - "The Fright Before Christmas" -
  (The Night Before Christmas poem parody)
  (written by David Shayne / Hermann Mejia art) (36-37)
- 11. Rush Limbaugh Fumbles on ESPN (written by Johnny Styne / Tom Nick Cocotos art) (38)
- 12. Kobe Bryant Gifts His Wife - "A diamond bribes her forever." -
  (A diamond is forever - ad parody) (written by Don Vaughan / Irving Schild photos) (40)
- 13. Michael Moore's Oscar Speech - "Stupid White Man" -
  (Stupid White Men book cover parody) (Irving Schild photos) (41)
- 14. Dixie Chicks Backlash - "Taboo - The Game of Unspeakable Viewpoints" (game parody)
  (written by Darren Johnson and Greg Leitman / Rick Tulka art) (42)
- 15. Alabama Judge Plays Moses -
  "The 10 Commandments as Practiced by Judge Roy Moore"
  (written by Stan Sinberg / Hermann Mejia art) (44)
- 16. Hillary Clinton's Story: First Lady and The Tramp (written by Arie Kaplan) (45)
- 17. Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher - "Mademi and Child" -
  (Madonna and Child - Raphael Santi painting parody) (James Warhola art) (46)
- 18. The Anti-Gay Crusade - "Evil Eye for the Queer Guy" -
  (Queer Eye for the Straight Guy TV poster parody) (Mark Stutzman art) (48)
- 19. Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez Bomb in Gigli - Fold-In (Al Jaffee) (49)
- 20. Homeland Security - "Tom Ridge's Taping Spaces" -
  (Trading Spaces TV poster parody) (written by Russ Cooper / Scott Bricher art) (50)
Unbend-A-Dent (ad parody) (written by Dick DeBartolo) (51)
Monroe and... The Presidency (written by Anthony Barbieri / Bill Wray art) (52-55)
A Mad Look at the Holidays (Sergio Aragones) (56-58)
Mad Counts Down Dick Clark's New Year's Rockin' Eve
(written by Butch D'Ambrosio / Drew Friedman art) (60)

Nick Meglin's last issue co-edited with John Ficarra

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