Mad #440 April 2004
- Cover Artist: Mark Fredrickson
- Contents Page (1)
- Letters (2,4,6)
(Mad notes the passing of George Woodbridge Jan 20th)
- Chia Head of State (ad parody)
(written by Charlie Kadau / Timothy Shamey art)
(Saddam sculpture by Liz Lomax) (5) 
- Sergio Aragones Drawn-Out Dramas
**various places around the magazine
- The Fundalini Pages (Scott Bricher, Tom Bunk, John Caldwell, Tom Nick Cocotos, Paul Coker, Jr., Dick DeBartolo, Desmond Devlin, Evan Dorkin, Garth Gerhart, Gary Hallgren, Jeff Kruse, Barry Liebmann, Scott Maiko, Kevin Pope, Mike Snider, Jack Syracuse, P. C. Vey) (IMPORTANT NOTE) (8-10)
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- Mad's Exclusive Transcript of Britney Spears' and
Jason Alexander's Wedding Vows (Tom Bunk art)
- Melvin & Jenkins' Guide to Television (written by Desmond Devlin / Kevin Pope art)
- Classified Ads
- Monkeys Are Always Funny - Hindenburg disaster (Evan Dorkin)
- Celebrity Cause of Death Betting Odds - Simon Cowell
(written by Mike Snider / Jack Syracuse art)
- Videogame Corner -
Things You Won't Overhear at the Next Videogame Convention (written by Jeff Kruse)
- Going to the Caldwell Once Too Often - proper brass pole technique (John Caldwell)
- Graphic Novel Review - Te-Di-Um! Legendary Legend of the Legend by Secun-Rate Hak
(written by Desmond Devlin / Gary Hallgren art)
- The Godfrey Report
- What's Pete Rose Betting On This Month? (Paul Coker, Jr. art)
- The Martha Stewart Trial - The Case For & Against (Tom Nick Cocotos art)
- Best Sellers Cut Down to Size - Bill O'Reilly - Who's Looking Out For You?
- Vey To Go - bedside visitors (P. C. Vey)
- Bitterman - wouldn't be caught dead at a place like Disneyworld (Garth Gerhart)
- Ad for taking Mad's survey (11)
- Bored of the Rings: Rehash of the Thing (movie satire)
(written by Desmond Devlin / Hermann Mejia art) (12-17)
- Is Your Mom's New Boyfriend a Keeper or a Loser? (John Caldwell) (18-20)
- Spy vs. Spy - helicopter and truck snipper arms (Peter Kuper) (21-22)
- Survivor: World Leaders (written by Joe Raiola / Sam Sisco art) (24-25)
- A Mad Look at Exams (Sergio Aragones) (26-29)
- Mad's Trumped-Up Scenes from The Apprentice (written by and video captures by Mike Snider) (30-31)
- Duke Bissell's Tales of Undisputed Interest -- plumbing repair / awakening from coma (P. C. Vey) (32)
- Mad's Suggestions for Improving American Idol (written by Greg Leitman / Tom Richmond art) (34-35)
- Monroe and... Survivor Jr. - Part 3 (written by Anthony Barbieri / Bill Wray art) (36-38)
- Mad's Etiquette Guide to Spring Break (written by Butch D'Ambrosio / Amanda Conner art) (39-41)
- Mad's Simply Dreadful Outtakes from American Idol
(written by and video captures by Mike Snider) (42-43)
- Joan of Archaic (TV satire) (written by Josh Gordon / Mort Drucker art) (44-48)
- Fold-In -- What competition will all eyes soon be focused on? (Al Jaffee) (C3)
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