MAD #269 — March 1987

"An argument is two people trying to get in the last word first." — Alfred E. Neuman

Contents

• Ad for Super Special Summer 1987 — MAD Bombs
  C2
• Contents Page

  (Alfred E. Headroom sort of introduces the issue)
  1
• Letters and Tomatoes Dept.

  Notes

  • Ads for Subscriptions featuring The Completely Mad Don Martin Bonus, Sergio Aragones Mad Pantomimes Paperback
  2–3
• Drawn-Out Dramas

  Marginal Thinking Dept.

  Sergio Aragones
  (various places around the magazine) summary
• Stand But Me (movie satire)

  Loco-Emotion Picture Dept. (A Year to Dismember)

  Written by Dick DeBartolo / Art by Mort Drucker

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • MAD Special #89 — September 1993
  • MAD's Greatest Artists — Mort Drucker — 2012
  4–8 sample
• Hidden Details in Art

  Paint Misbehavin' Dept.

  Written by Tom Koch / Art by Bob Clarke

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD Special #86 — March 1993
  9–11
• Drama on Page 12

  (golf flagstick pulls up hole)

  A Hole in Fun Dept.

  John Caldwell

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • MAD Special #87 — May 1993
  • MAD #21 — October 2021
  12 sample
• Fund Raisers That Never Made It!

  Dick DePt.

  Written by Dick DeBartolo / Art by Harvey Kurtzman and Will Elder

  Reprinted in 4 collections

  • MAD Special #84 — November 1992
  • MAD Art — 2002 (excerpt)
  • MAD XL #26 — March 2004
  • 1001 MAD Pages You Must Read Before You Die — 2009
  13–15
• Mini-Movies Featuring the Fickle Finger of Fate

  All Jaffee Dept.

  Al Jaffee

  Reprinted in 4 collections

  • MAD Special #86 — March 1993
  • The MAD Bathroom Companion — Turd in a Series — 2003
  • The MAD Bathroom Companion — The Mother Load — 2004
  • Totally Inside MAD — 2016
  16–19
• I Love Luny (TV rerun satire)

  A Bad Case of the Re-Runs Dept.

  Written by Lou Silverstone / Art by Angelo Torres

  Reprinted in 3 collections

  • MAD Special #89 — September 1993
  • MAD Special #127 — March 1998
  • MAD About TV — 1999
  20–21
• Your Pet Has Reached Blissful Retirement When...

  It's Waning Cats and Dogs and... Dept.

  Paul Peter Porges

  Reprinted in 4 collections

  • MAD Special #84 — November 1992
  • MAD Art — 2002 (excerpt)
  • The MAD Bathroom Companion — The Gushing Fourth Edition — 2004
  • MAD Goes to the Dogs & Other Beasties! — Special Collector's Edition 2024
  22–23
• The Lighter Side of...

  Berg's-Eye View Dept.

  Dave Berg
  24–28
• Around Noon on a Downtown Street Corner

  Don Martin Dept. Part I

  Written by Stanley Swiersz / Art by Don Martin

  Reprinted in 3 collections

  • MAD XL #25 — January 2004
  • MAD's Greatest Artists — The Completely Mad Don Martin — 2007
  • MAD's Greatest Artists — Don Martin — 2014
  29
• A MAD Look at Going to the Movies

  Sergio Aragones Dept.

  Sergio Aragones

  Reprinted in 3 collections

  • MAD Special #84 — November 1992
  • The MAD Bathroom Companion — 2000
  • The MAD Bathroom Companion — The Mother Load — 2004
  30–31
• Instructional Sports Videos We'd Like to See

  Tape Me Out of the Ballgame Dept.

  Written by Mike Snider / Art by Jack Davis

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • MAD Special #87 — May 1993
  • The MAD Bathroom Companion — The Gushing Fourth Edition — 2004
  32–33
• Late One Afternoon in the Dungeon

  Don Martin Dept. Part II

  Written by Don (Duck) Edwing / Art by Don Martin

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD's Greatest Artists — The Completely Mad Don Martin — 2007
  34
• The Mess Commission Report on Pornography

  Get Smut! Dept.

  Written by Charlie Kadau and Joe Raiola / Art by George Woodbridge / Photos by Irving Schild

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD Special #90 — November 1993
  35–38 sample
• Odes to Appliances, Gadgets, and other Modern Conveniences

  A Word to Device Dept.

  Idea by Marilyn Atkins / Written by Frank Jacobs / Art by George Woodbridge

  Reprinted in 3 collections

  • MAD Special #92 — March 1994
  • The MAD Bathroom Companion — Turd in a Series — 2003
  • The MAD Bathroom Companion — The Mother Load — 2004
  39–41
• How Do You Rate as a Yuppie?

  Measuring Up-Scale Dept.

  Written by Tom Koch / Art by Paul Coker, Jr.

  Reprinted in 6 collections

  • Completely MAD — 1991 (excerpt)
  • MAD Special #84 — November 1992
  • MAD About the Eighties — 1999
  • MAD XL #22 — July 2003
  • MAD For Decades — 2007
  • 1001 MAD Pages You Must Read Before You Die — 2009
  42–43 sample
• Spy vs. Spy — hidden boat cannon

  (last one exclusively by Antonio Prohias)

  Joke and Dagger Dept.

  Antonio Prohias

  Reprinted in 4 collections

  • MAD Special #87 — May 1993
  • Spy Vs. Spy — The Complete Casebook — Antonio Prohias — 2001
  • Spy Vs. Spy — Omnibus — Antonio Prohias — 2011
  • MAD Presents Spy Vs. Spy — An Explosive Celebration — 2015
  44 sample
• TV Spin-Offs Yet to Come

  Hack to the Future Dept.

  Written by Tom Koch / Art by Angelo Torres

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD Special #87 — May 1993
  45–47
• MAD Charts

  Stat's All, Folks! Dept.

  Written by Charlie Kadau and Joe Raiola

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD Special #87 — May 1993
  48
• Fold-In — What rampant form of addiction threatens the foundation of our society?

  Al Jaffee

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • MAD Special #84 — November 1992
  • The MAD Fold-In Collection 1964–2010 — 2011
  C3
• Back Cover — MAD Celebrity Madballs

  Written by John Prete / Art by Harvey Kurtzman and Will Elder

  Reprinted in 3 collections

  • MAD Special #86 — March 1993
  • The MAD Gross Book — 2001
  • MAD #34 — December 2023
  C4