MAD #284 — January 1989

"You know the world's in trouble when it takes 2,000 laws to enforce the Ten Commandments!" — Alfred E. Neuman

Contents

• Ad for Subscriptions

  Kelly Freas art from MAD #52
  C2
• Contents Page
  1
• Letters and Tomatoes Dept.

  Notes

  • Ad for MAD's Al Jaffee Sweats Out Another Book paperback
  2–3
• Drawn-Out Dramas

  Marginal Thinking Dept.

  Sergio Aragones
  (various places around the magazine)
• Biggie (movie satire)

  Hanks Giving Turkey Dept.

  Written by Arnie Kogen / Art by Mort Drucker

  Reprinted in 3 collections

  • MAD Special #95 — September 1994
  • MAD XL #9 — June 2001
  • 1001 MAD Pages You Must Read Before You Die — 2009
  4–8
• The Appalling Amazon Appetizer

  Tales From the Duck Side Dept.

  Don (Duck) Edwing

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • MAD Special #98 — Mid Summer 1994
  • The MAD Gross Book — 2001
  9
• MAD Re-Examines Some Wise Old Sayings

  It Doesn't Adage Up Dept.

  Written by Tom Koch / Art by Paul Coker, Jr.

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD Special #90 — November 1993
  10–11
• Careers for Athletes Past Their Prime

  Entering the Jock Market Dept.

  Written by Paul Peter Porges / Art by Jack Davis

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD Special #90 — November 1993
  12–13
• Play Pictionary With the MAD Artists (18 artists!)

  Quick Draw Guffaw Dept.

  Written by John Prete / Art by John Caldwell, Jack Davis, Mort Drucker, Al Jaffee, Sam Viviano, George Woodbridge, Dave Berg, Don (Duck) Edwing, Bob Jones, Harvey Kurtzman, Paul Peter Porges, Angelo Torres, Sergio Aragones, Bob Clarke, Paul Coker, Jr., Gerry Gersten, Antonio Prohias, Richard Williams

  Reprinted in 4 collections

  • MAD Special #92 — March 1994
  • MAD XL #30 — November 2004
  • 1001 MAD Pages You Must Read Before You Die — 2009
  • MAD #34 — December 2023
  14–15 sample
• 15 Reasons Why Only Mindless Idiots Can "Have a Nice Day"

  Ignorance is Blitzed Dept.

  Written by Tom Koch / Art by John Caldwell

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • MAD Special #90 — November 1993
  • MAD XL #27 — June 2004
  16–18
• Numbing to America (movie satire)

  Throne for a Loss Dept.

  Written by Stan Hart / Art by Sam Viviano

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD Special #93 — May 1994
  19–22 sample
• The Cockamamie Congo Cookout

  Tales From the Duck Side Dept.

  Don (Duck) Edwing

  Reprinted in 3 collections

  • MAD Special #98 — Mid Summer 1994
  • MAD XL #30 — November 2004
  • 1001 MAD Pages You Must Read Before You Die — 2009
  23
• The MAD People Watcher's Guide to a Shopping Mall at Christmas

  Claud and Effect Dept.

  Written by Mike Snider / Art by Sergio Aragones

  Reprinted in 6 collections

  • MAD Stocking Stuffer — 1999
  • MAD Special #134 — January 1999
  • MAD XL #31 — January 2005
  • 1001 MAD Pages You Must Read Before You Die — 2009
  • MAD's Greatest Artists: Sergio Aragonés — 2010
  • MAD Stocking Stuffer — Special Collector's Edition 2016
  24–25
• The Lighter Side of...

  Berg's-Eye View Dept.

  Dave Berg
  26–30
• The Real Demographics of Various TV Audiences

  Stat's Entertainment! Dept.

  Written by Mike Snider / Art by Bob Clarke

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD Special #93 — May 1994
  31–33
• When Scandals Completely Take Over the News

  Every Story Has Immoral Dept.

  Written by Tom Koch / Art by Al Jaffee

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD Special #90 — November 1993
  34–35
• Only When You're in a Hurry...

  Delay's the Thing Dept.

  Paul Peter Porges

  Reprinted in 3 collections

  • MAD Special #95 — September 1994
  • MAD XL #1 — January 2000
  • 1001 MAD Pages You Must Read Before You Die — 2009
  36–37
• Spy vs. Spy — submarine safe

  Joke and Dagger Dept.

  Bob Clarke

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • MAD Special #92 — March 1994
  • Spy Vs. Spy 2 — The Joke and Dagger Files — 2007
  38
• The Last Resort — The Newsletter for Desperate Singles

  The Linking Memorial Dept.

  Written by Charlie Kadau and Joe Raiola / Art by George Woodbridge

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD Special #90 — November 1993
  39–42 sample
• Who De-Famed Robber Rabbit (movie satire)

  Go Ahead, Animate My Day Dept.

  Written by Dick DeBartolo / Art by Angelo Torres
  43–46
• The Sizzling South Seas Supper

  Tales From the Duck Side Dept.

  Don (Duck) Edwing

  Reprinted in 3 collections

  • MAD Special #98 — Mid Summer 1994
  • MAD XL #32 — March 2005
  • 1001 MAD Pages You Must Read Before You Die — 2009
  47
• MAD's Christmas Believe It or Nuts!

  An Embarrassment of Richard's Dept.

  Written by Dick DeBartolo / Art by Bob Clarke

  Reprinted in 3 collections

  • MAD Special #134 — January 1999
  • MAD Stocking Stuffer — 1999
  • MAD Stocking Stuffer — Special Collector's Edition 2016
  48
• Fold-In — What one thing makes life in the fast lane possible?

  Al Jaffee

  Reprinted in 3 collections

  • MAD Special #95 — September 1994
  • MAD Color Classics #10 — September 2004
  • The MAD Fold-In Collection 1964–2010 — 2011
  C3
• Back Cover — Decision '88 — Dukakis or Bush? — Just Say No!

  Written by Charlie Kadau and Joe Raiola
  C4