MAD #453 — May 2005

"People who swear they'll stick to their diets usually end up eating their words!" — Alfred E. Neuman

Contents

• Contents Page
  1
• Letters and Tomatoes Dept.
  2–4
• Drawn-Out Dramas

  Marginal Thinking Dept.

  Sergio Aragones
  (various places around the magazine) summary
• The Fundalini Pages

  Random Acts of Mindless Dept.

  Friends of Fundalini Notes

  • "Friends of Fundalini" list of contributors not originally attached to the articles in this section: Charles Akins, John Caldwell, Desmond Devlin, Don (Duck) Edwing, Garth Gerhart, Greg Laub, Scott Maiko, Jerry Ordway, Kevin Pope, Andrew J. Schwartzberg, Rick Tulka — DETAILS

  • Punchlines in Search of a Joke (3 times) — John Caldwell
    Reprinted in 1 collection

    • MAD Classics #5 — February 2006
  • Stupid Ikea Product Name or Cartoon Sound Effect? — Art by Don (Duck) Edwing
  • Bitterman — “I have no son!” — Garth Gerhart
  • The Lowest Rated “Top 100” Countdown TV Shows — Art by Rick Tulka
  • Highlights From Michael Jackson's Latest Video Message to the World —
    Written by Desmond Devlin
  • Classified Ads
  • Graphic Novel Review — The X-Custodians — He Who Wields the Mop! —
    Written by Desmond Devlin / Art by Jerry Ordway
    Reprinted in 1 collection

    • The Freebie MAD — 2005
  • Melvin & Jenkins' Guide to Partygoing — Written by Desmond Devlin / Art by Kevin Pope
  • Fundalini Foto News: The 2005 Grammy Awards
  • Baseball Steroid Penalties That Would Really Work —
    Written by Andrew J. Schwartzberg / Art by Charles Akins
  6–8, 10
• Lots (TV satire)

  Plane Nonsense Dept.

  Written by Dick DeBartolo / Art by Tom Richmond

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • MAD Classics #5 — February 2006
  • Totally MAD — 2012
  12–16
• Spy vs. Spy — plane wings clap / bag on mousetrap has mousetrap

  Joke and Dagger Dept.

  Peter Kuper

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • Spy Vs. Spy 2 — The Joke and Dagger Files — 2007
  • Spy vs. Spy — The Top Secret Files — 2011
  18–19
• 9 Surefire Ways to Improve the NBA's Lousy Image

  Court Reform Dept.

  Written by Jacob Lambert / Art by Paul Coker, Jr.
  20–21
• Ad for Spy vs. Spy Xbox game

  Features Spy vs. Spy “Classic Moment” by Antonio Prohias
  22–23
• When Tattoo Artists Go Bad

  On the Ink of Disaster Dept.

  John Caldwell
  24–26
• Monroe and… Paintball

  Angster's Paradise Dept.

  Written by Anthony Barbieri / Art by Bill Wray
  31–34
• The 25 Least Powerful People in Sports

  Plays of the Weak Dept.

  Written by Jeff Kruse / Art by Kevin Pope

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • Extremely Moronic MAD — 2012
  36–39
• 7 Periods Closer to Death

  That's Rall, Folks! Dept.

  Ted Rall
  40
• Ad for The New and Improved MAD Website — madmag.com
  41
• Donald Trump, You're Fired!!!

  Getting Canned Laughter Dept.

  Written by Russ Cooper / Art by Sam Sisco

  Reprinted in 4 collections

  • MAD Classics #5 — February 2006
  • Totally MAD — 2012
  • The Golden Treasury of Trash — Special Collector's Edition 2013
  • MAD About Trump — 2017
  42–43
• A MAD Look at Paintball

  Serge-In General Dept.

  Sergio Aragones

  Reprinted in 4 collections

  • MAD Kids #2 — March 2006
  • MAD's Greatest Artists: Sergio Aragonés — 2010
  • Epic MAD — 2012
  • Amazingly Stupid MAD — Expanded Edition — 2013
  44–47
• Signs We Need in Post 9/11 America

  Poster Chide Dept.

  Written by Jacob Lambert / Art by Nathan Fox

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • MAD Classics #5 — February 2006
  • Extremely Moronic MAD — 2012
  48–49
• Disparate No-Lives (TV satire)

  Down the Hatcher Dept.

  Written by David Shayne / Art by Mort Drucker

  Reprinted in 3 collections

  • MAD Classics #5 — February 2006
  • 1001 MAD Pages You Must Read Before You Die — 2009
  • Totally MAD — 2012
  50–55
• 13 Things You Never Want to Hear From a Computer Tech Support Guy

  Help Is on the Wane Dept.

  Written by Jeff Kruse / Art by Peter Bagge

  Reprinted in 4 collections

  • White Castle Goes MAD — 2005
  • MAD Classics #5 — February 2006
  • MAD #30 — April 2023
  • MAD Treasure Trove of Trash — Vol. 5 — Apr/May 2023
  56 sample
• Fold-In — What is the hottest thing in music today?

  Al Jaffee

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • The MAD Fold-In Collection 1964–2010 — 2011
  C3