Mad #512 December 2011

• Cover Artist: Mark Fredrickson

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• Ad for Mad's Blog: The Idiotical
• Contents Page
• Letters (photo of Jimi Hendrix reading #113,
  Dick DeBartolo with Inkpot Award from San Diego Comic-Con)
• Sergio Aragones Drawn Out Dramas
  **various obscure places around the magazine
• Ad for Spymuseumstore.org - for Spy vs. Spy stuff
• Ad For Subscriptions with #154 bonus print
• The Fundalini Pages
  • The Fast Five - Reasons You Didn't Get Raptured on October 21 (written by Jeff Kruse / Bob Staake art)
  • Plugged Nickel (written by Kit Lively / Scott Nickel art)

• Funeral Home Services You Probably Don't Want to Spring For
  (written by John Caldwell / Kevin Pope art)
• The Cover We Didn't Use
• Donnie the Douche's Guide to Slashing Your Veterinary Bills (written by Jeff Kruse)
• The Faster Five - Things We Can Look Forward to If Michele Bachmann Becomes President
  (written by Jacob Lambert / Ward Sutton art)
• Pull My Cheney (Tom Cheney)
• The Fastest Five - Reasons for the Libyan Revolution
  (written by Barry Liebmann / Paul Coker, Jr. art)
• Parade - What People Earn - Great Recession Edition
• The Fast Four +1 - Reasons Burger King is Retiring The King
  (written by Kit Lively / Evan Dorkin and Sarah Dyer art)
• On Sale Now! - Rick Perry's Page-A-Day Execution Calendar
• Celebrity Cause-of-Death Betting Odds - Kate Middleton (Sam Viviano art)
• Other Ways the U.S. Postal Service is Cutting Back (written by Jeff Kruse / Anton Emdin art)
• The Last Fast Five - Early Rumors About the Dirty Dancing Remake
  (written by Jeff Kruse / Rick Tulka art)
• When the Going Gets Duff (J. C. Duffy)
• Bitterman (Garth Gerhart)
• Ad For Subscriptions (art from #52)
• The Walking Dud (TV satire) (written by Desmond Devlin / Hermann Mejia art)
• Ad for Mad Books
• The Mad Obituary Pages (written by Jeff Kruse / James Warhola art)
• Snappy Answers to Stupid Questions (Al Jaffee / color by Tom Luth)
• A Mad Look At The Apocalypse (Sergio Aragones / color by Tom Luth and Carl Peterson)
• Mad 60th Anniversary 2012 Calendar (montage of various cover images)
• Planet TAD!!!!! (written by Tim Carvell / Brian Durniak art)
• Signs Your Tae Kwon Do Instructor May Be Over the Hill (John Caldwell)
• Movie Mashups We'd Hate to See (Scott Bricher art)
• One Day on the Hudson River (What Really Happened) (Steven Day photo)
• Punitive Damages - A Game of Supreme Justice (written by Desmond Devlin / Tom Richmond art)
• The Mad Vault Article From #209 -- The Turtle (written by Paul Peter Porges / Paul Coker, Jr. art)
• The Strip Club
  • It Only Hurts When I Laugh (Christopher Baldwin)
  • Projectile Vomit Baby (Scott Nickel)
  • Which Panel Doesn't Belong? (S. A. Johnsen and Jen Sorensen)
  • Got Your Nose (Jacob Lambert)
  • Brown Bear (Noah Van Sciver)
  • The Machine That Travels Through Time (Joey Alison Sayers)
  • Just Below the Surface (Douglas Paszkiewicz)
• Recycling - it's everybody's job! (written by Dick DeBartolo / Gary Hallgren art)
• Celebrity Rock, Paper, Scissors (written by Dave Croatto / various photos)
• Spy vs. Spy vs. Spy / Spy vs. Spy (Peter Kuper)
• Are You a Candidate For the Zit Hall of Fame? (Tom Cheney / color by Carl Peterson)
• Fold-In -- Which union is the Republican party most eager to break up? (Al Jaffee)