MAD #529 — October 2014

"These days, you'd have to be crazy to run for political office — and that pretty much explains everything!" — Alfred E. Neuman

Contents

• Contents Page

  It's the List We Can Do Dept.
  1
• Letters and Tomatoes Dept.
  2–4
• Ad for MAD's Greatest Artists — Dave Berg — Five Decades of "The Lighter Side of..."
  5
• Drawn-Out Dramas

  Marginal Thinking Dept.

  Sergio Aragones
  (various obscure places around the magazine)
• The Fundalini Pages

  • Celebrity Cause of Death Betting Odds — Jeff Bezos — Art by Rick Tulka
  • Historical Sports "Firsts" We're Still Waiting For — Written by Jeff Kruse / Art by Kevin Pope
  • When the Going Gets Duff — when animals attack, verbally — J. C. Duffy
  • TV Shows with the Same Title as Their Porn Parodies — Written by Matt Lassen
  • The Cover We Didn't Use — How's My Texting While Driving? — Written by Jason Mustian / Art by Chris Houghton
  • The Fast 5 — Interesting Facts About Marriage — Written by Jeff Kruse / Art by Peter Bagge
  • How Different Networks Would Cover the Story of a Giant Meteor Heading Toward Earth — Written by Megan O'Leary / Art by Sam Sisco
    Reprinted in 1 collection

    • MAD #49 — June 2026
  • The MAD Consumer Helper-Outer Guide —
    Simple Ways to Save on Food — Written by Jeff Kruse
  • Eckstein Marks the Spot! — "Ed was claustrophobic." — Bob Eckstein
  • Ways The Pope Could Be Even Awesomer — Written by Mike Morse / Art by Paul Coker sample
  • Worst Selling K-Cup Flavors — Written by Kenny Keil
  • Positive Things About the Time Warner Cable / Comcast Merger — Written by Dick DeBartolo / Art by Tom Bunk
  • Bitterman — overlooking flaws — Garth Gerhart
  • Classic Bumper Stickers Updated — Written by Jason Mustian
  • Oy Vey! — "sitting on my testicles!" — P. C. Vey
  • AOL Start-Up Screens We'd Like To See — Written by Jeff Kruse / Actor Scott Griessel
  6–10
• Perfect Bacon Bed (ad parody)

  Soo-eet Dreams Dept.

  Art by Scott Bricher

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • MAD #29 — February 2023
  • MAD Treasure Trove of Trash — Vol. 4 — Nov/Dec 2022
  11
• Snark Tank (TV satire)

  Venture Time Dept.

  Written by Dick DeBartolo / Art by Tom Richmond

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD #43 — June 2025
  12–16
• Ad for Subscriptions

  with MAD #94 bonus print
  17
• Your Parents Say To You... One Day You Will Say To Them...

  Circle of Strife Dept.

  Written by Matt Lassen / Art by Tim Hamilton
  18–19
• Spy vs. Spy — soccer ball bomb / punch out of graffitied brick wall

  Joke and Dagger Dept.

  Peter Kuper
  20–21
• Questions We'd Like to Ask Justin Bieber

  Q and A-hole Dept.

  Written by Matt Lassen / Art by Hermann Mejia
  22–23
• A MAD Look At Grilling

  Serge-In General Dept.

  Sergio Aragones / Color by Jim Campbell
  24–27
• What Has Luke Skywalker Been Up To For the Last 30 Years?

  Bio-curious Dept.

  Written by Jonathan Bresman / Art by Anton Emdin

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • MAD Spoofs Star Wars and Other Sci-Fi — Special Collector's Edition 2017
  • MAD Spoofs Star Wars — Special Collector's Edition 2019
  28–29
• The Worst People to Sit Near on a Plane

  The Jet Offensive Dept.

  Teresa Burns Parkhurst

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • MAD #32 — August 2023
  • MAD Treasure Trove of Trash — Vol. 6 — Jul/Aug 2023
  30–31
• Ad for Tons of MAD Books
  32–33
• A Google Glass Wearer's Photo Album

  Specs Offender Dept.

  Written by Frank Jacobs / Art by John Kerschbaum
  34–35
• The MAD Vault

  Rotten to the Encore Dept.

  Article from MAD #202: Recycling Your Throw-Aways —
  Written by Paul Peter Porges / Art by Al Jaffee
  36–38
• When Twitter's Maximum Character Rule Saves People From Saying Too Much

  The Funny Side of the Tweet Dept.

  Written by Evan Waite
  39
• A Disgraced Politician's Guide to the Do's and Don'ts at a Hastily Called Press Conference

  Spinning and Losing Dept.

  John Caldwell
  40–41
• Ad for MAD — The 100 Dumbest People, Events & Things of the Century (so far)
  42
• The Strip Club

  Pen and Stink Dept.

  • Deadly Survival — Nathan Cooper
  • Trigger McBride: Horse Cop — The Perils of Paperwork — Peet Tamburino
  • Peak of Absurdity — Emily Flake
  • WTF, Jeff? or My Roommate Might Be a Serial Killer —
    Written by Kit Lively / Art by Scott Nickel
  • Schmience! — Mike Jacobsen
  43–46
• The 50 Worst Things About Food

  Where Eats Meets Jest Dept.

  Written by Desmond Devlin / Art by Peter Kuper, Josh Mecouch, Justin Peterson and Rich Powell

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • MAD #29 — February 2023
  • MAD Treasure Trove of Trash — Vol. 4 — Nov/Dec 2022
  47–53
• The Best of The Idiotical

  Our Daily Dread Dept.

  • Barack Obama in Iraq to the Future
  • Jay Z vs. Solange: The Tale of the Tape
  • You Know You're Really 70 When... (George Lucas edition)
  • Kimye's "Just Married" Pic: The Uncropped Version
  • Latest Google Doodle Salutes World Cup Bite
  • Who's Streaming "Orange is the New Black"?
  • Godzilla vs. Hero Cat
  • MAD Presents Even More Emoji Biographies
  54–55
• Ad for MAD App for the iPad
  56
• Fold-In — What relic from the 80s is no one excited to see return?

  All Jaffee Dept.

  Al Jaffee
  C3 sample
• Back Cover — iPad Air (ad parody)
  C4