MAD #397 — September 2000

"Many a good egg ends up getting beaten!" — Alfred E. Neuman

Contents

• Ad for MAD's Website

  madmag.com
  C2
• Contents Page

  Notes

  • Vey To Go — car-driving bear (P. C. Vey), ad for MAD Color Classics #2 — September 2000
  1–3
• Letters and Tomatoes Dept.

  Notes

  • Photos — 20 years apart — of Deborah Harry with MAD
  4–5
• Drawn-Out Dramas

  Marginal Thinking Dept.

  Sergio Aragones
  (various places around the magazine) summary
• Gatorador (movie satire)

  Crowe's Feat Dept.

  Written by Arnie Kogen / Art by Angelo Torres

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • MAD About The Oscars — 2004
  • MAD Presents Oscar Winners (and Losers!) — Special Collector's Edition 2016
  6–10
• Monroe &… The High Seas — Part Two: The Monkey Island Massacre

  Angster's Paradise Dept.

  Written by Anthony Barbieri / Art by Bill Wray

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD Classics #17 — September 2007
  11–14
• Legitimate Gripes of Your Average Serial Killer

  Dumb & Dahmer Dept.

  John Caldwell

  Reprinted in 3 collections

  • MAD Classics #11 — November 2006
  • Horrifyingly MAD — 2011
  • MAD Spoofs Horror — Special Collector's Edition 2017
  15–17
• Melvin & Jenkins' Guide to Hospitals

  The Schmucks Stop Here Dept.

  Written by Desmond Devlin / Art by Kevin Pope

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD Classics #2 — September 2005
  18–19
• Alternate Designs for the New $20 Bill

  The Bucks Flop Here Dept.

  Written by Darren Johnson / Art by Scott Bricher

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD Classics #3 — November 2005
  20–23
• Letters to Britney Spears

  Guided Missive Attacks Dept.

  Written by Mike Snider / Art by Jack Syracuse

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD Classics #1 — August 2005
  24–25
• Spy vs. Spy — credit card bomb

  Joke and Dagger Dept.

  Peter Kuper

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • Spy Vs. Spy 2 — The Joke and Dagger Files — 2007
  26–27
• A MAD Peek Behind the Scenes at a Modern Health Spa

  An Embarrassment of Richard's Dept.

  Written by Dick DeBartolo / Art by Paul Coker, Jr.

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD Classics #8 — July 2006
  28–29
• Modern Celebrity Couple Dilemmas

  Airing Their Dirty Quandary Dept.

  Written by Mike Snider / Art by Rick Tulka

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • MAD XL #13 — January 2002 (excerpt)
  • MAD Classics #3 — November 2005
  30–32
• MAD's Modern Military Course Catalog

  The Armed Farces Dept.

  Written by Mike Snider and Andrew J. Schwartzberg / Art by George Woodbridge
  33–35 sample
• A MAD Look at Swimming Pools

  Serge-In General Dept.

  Sergio Aragones

  Reprinted in 4 collections

  • MAD Classics #8 — July 2006
  • MAD Kids #8 — August 2007
  • Amazingly Stupid MAD — 2012
  • Amazingly Stupid MAD — Expanded Edition — 2013
  36–38
• The Lighter Side of...

  Berg's-Eye View Dept.

  Dave Berg

  Reprinted in 1 collection

  • MAD Classics #2 — September 2005
  39–42
• Selecting the Right High School Clique for You

  Peers Today, Gone Tomorrow Dept.

  Written by Mike Snider / Art by

  • The Shredder Clique — Tom Bunk
  • The Cyber-Geek Clique — Timothy Shamey
  • The Stoner Clique — Leslie Sternbergh
  • The Rah-Rah Clique — Hermann Mejia
  • The God Squad Clique — R.J. Matson
  • The Wigger Clique — Kyle Baker
  • The Junior P. C. Clique — Amanda Conner
  • The Drama Dweeb Clique — Ray Alma
  • The Psycho Clique — Bill Wray

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • MAD Art — 2002 (excerpt)
  • MAD Classics #4 — January 2006
  43–47
• MAD's Celebrity Cause-of-Death Betting Odds: The Taco Bell Chihuahua

  Grieving Las Vegas Dept.

  Written by Mike Snider / Art by Hermann Mejia
  48
• Fold-In — What change to the landscape do environmentalists fear the most?

  Al Jaffee

  Reprinted in 2 collections

  • MAD Classics #14 — April 2007
  • The MAD Fold-In Collection 1964–2010 — 2011
  C3
• Back Cover — The Rock Concert

  Written by Michael Gallagher / Art by Tom Bunk

  Reprinted in 3 collections

  • The MAD Gross Book — 2001
  • MAD Classics #16 — July 2007
  • MAD #13 — June 2020
  C4