Doug Gilford
Doug Gilford's MAD Cover Site

MAD Magazine Recurring Features

You Know You're Really When…

(and a few other When's…)

in Order of Appearance in Regular Issues

Article Title Writer / Artist Issue / Date
You Know You're Really Getting Old When… Phil Hahn and Jack Hanrahan /
Paul Coker, Jr.
116 — Jan 1968
You Know You're Really Married When… Phil Hahn and Jack Hanrahan /
Paul Coker, Jr.
117 — Mar 1968
You Know You're Really a Parent When… Phil Hahn and Jack Hanrahan /
Paul Coker, Jr.
119 — Jun 1968
You Know You've Really Made It When… Frank Ridgeway / Paul Coker, Jr. 125 — Mar 1969
You Know You're Really Overweight When… Jack Kent / Paul Coker, Jr. 128 — Jul 1969
You Know You're Really a Nobody When… Jack Kent / Paul Coker, Jr. 130 — Oct 1969
You Know You're Really in Trouble When… Tom Koch / Jack Rickard 131 — Dec 1969
You Know You're Really on Your Own When… Tom Koch and Gloria L. Rich /
Paul Coker, Jr.
134 — Apr 1970
You Know You're Really a Bore When… Stan Hart / Paul Coker, Jr. 135 — Jun 1970
You Know You're Really a Football Fan When… Stan Hart / Jack Davis 140 — Jan 1971
You Know It's Really Over When… Al Jaffee and Gloria L. Rich /
Jack Rickard
143 — Jun 1971
You Know You're Really Grown Up When… Alis Ellis / Paul Coker, Jr. 149 — Mar 1972
You Know You're Really Divorced When… Lloyd Gola 150 — Apr 1972
You Know Your Days Are Numbered When… Tom Koch / Bob Clarke 151 — Jun 1972
You Know You've Really Got a Problem When… Tom Koch / Bob Clarke 156 — Jan 1973
You Know It's Really Summer When… Tom Koch / Jack Rickard 162 — Oct 1973
You Know There's Something Fishy When… Tom Koch / Jack Rickard 167 — Jun 1974
You Know You Married a Gal/Guy Who's Much Too Young/Old For You When… Lloyd Gola 170 — Oct 1974
You Have Reached a State of Apathy When… Lou Silverstone / Jack Rickard 171 — Dec 1974
You Know You're Really a Pet Owner When… Lloyd Gola 173 — Mar 1975
It Almost Restores Your Faith When… Lou Silverstone / Jack Rickard 174 — Apr 1975
It's Bad Timing When… Lou Silverstone / Jack Rickard 175 — Jun 1975
It Ain't Fair When… Lou Silverstone / Jack Rickard 177 — Sep 1975
Take It With a Grain of Salt When… Lou Silverstone / Jack Davis 183 — Jun 1976
It's Adding Insult to Injury When… Lou Silverstone / Jack Rickard 189 — Mar 1977
You Don't Give a %#*&!*? What Other People Think When… Larry Siegel / Bob Jones /
Marc Bilgrey (idea)
191 — Jun 1977
How Come You Worry About…When… Stan Hart / Jack Rickard 195 — Dec 1977
You're a Victim of Bad Timing When… Paul Peter Porges 212 — Jan 1980
You Know He/She is Not For You When… Stan Hart / Paul Coker, Jr. 238 — Apr 1983
You Know You're in a Second Marriage When… Lloyd Gola 244 — Jan 1984
Your Pet Has Reached Blissful Retirement When… Paul Peter Porges 269 — Mar 1987
Summer Has Arrived When… Tom Koch / Paul Coker, Jr. 273 — Sep 1987
It's Safe to go to the Bathroom When… Paul Peter Porges 286 — Apr 1989
It's Never a Good Sign When… John Prete / Al Jaffee 287 — Jun 1989
Your Show Biz Career is Definitely in the Dumper When… Mike Snider / Paul Coker, Jr. 324 — Jan 1994
What Does it Say About Playing by the Rules When… Mike Snider / Sam Viviano 326 — Mar/Apr 1994
You Know America's Been Nuked When… Andrew J. Schwartzberg / 342 — Jan/Feb 1996
You're Really Not Much of a Terrorist If… John Caldwell 372 — Aug 1998
Is It Really Cause for Celebration When… John Prete / James Warhola 391 — Mar 2000
You Know You're Osama bin Laden When… / Ray Alma 416 — Apr 2002
You Know a Rapper's Gone Soft When… Jacob Lambert / Hermann Mejia 444 — Aug 2004
You Know You're Really 70 When…
(George Lucas Edition)
529 — Oct 2014
You Know You're Really 60 When… (Bill Gates Edition) 537 — Feb 2016
You Know You're Really _______ When...

Excerpt from You Know You're Really a Bore When… — from #135, June 1970